Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Hide and Sick?

“I once live a healthy normal life. It was also not too long ago that I finally got my Degree. Doing the things I love to do, traveling to unknown places, trying out all kinds of foods, planning for the future, having dreams and aspirations and spending my life together with the love of my life. These are among the many things that I could do in this life. When I met the love of my life, we were so in love and we still are until this very day. There seems to be nothing that could come between us because we both believe in love to be the most important thing in life. I really believe love is the greatest of all things and I should protect the love that I have. Until that one faithful day, everything seems to falls apart….

After I had a few series of mild black out session which I had kept secret from anyone, I went to see the doctor one day and it turns out that I had cancer. It had been such a shock to me that I could not brought myself to tell anyone about it. Flashes of my life with my love came tumbling down. It is sad to imagine that I would be gone from this world just like that. Sadder even, to see that my love will have to go on living without me. Our once promising future together, to get married and grow old together will not come true. How could I tell my love that I would be living? Perhaps I shall make my love hate me now so that seeing me go will make the pain become more bearable.”
The above scenario sounds familiar isn’t it? I have watched many movies and television series which has those sort of story line where a loving couple’s life together became a living hell when either one of them contacted a life threatening illness. Some will pain stackingly inform their life partner and some will leave their love and hide away before their love partner sees how much they suffer with the illness.

I have been trying to imagine what if this kind of situation happens to me. What would I do? Will I still be with my love, and try to live the remaining days together as meaningful as it can be? Or will I find excuses to leave him without him know the truth and hide away to die alone? I could not come up with a solid answer or decision. Perhaps, this decision can only be answered when it is really happening to me. Kind of scary when I think of this. But I believe everything happens, happens for a reason and God has plan for all of us. And God’s plan is always good. It is up to us, how we see it and where our perspective is.

3 comments:

sting said...

well.. having gone thru life as what I've been thru.. I would say we should seize the moment and live life to the fullest.. doesn't mean that we need to jump onto the next plane for a trip overseas but to enjoy life and perhaps complain less or compliment more...

there's no reason one should live alone if one is "dying" but by sharing the "burden" with those that one loves, it's a less lonely path.. and when that day comes, its not goodbye but "see you later" :-)

Amidrin said...

sting, that's a good piece of positive insight you've given here. I agree, that's a good way of living life with a more positive attitude that could come handy in any situations.

Tot's Mom said...

Well, some things are beyond our control. When it comes to deeply profound events, I believe we wouldn't really know what steps we will take and where we will end up until it actually happens.